Popularity is a subjective concept when it comes to television. There are mainstream TV shows that it seems like everyone is watching, such as Friends, Seinfeld, The Sopranos, Lost and American Idol (hopefully, that'll be the only time I ever mention American Idol on this blog... except for just then, when I mentioned it a second time). Others have large viewerships, but only appeal to certain niche audiences: Star Trek for sci-fi enthusiasts, True Blood for vampire aficionados, Desperate Housewives for those who enjoy night-time soap operas, Degrassi for teenagers, Saved By the Bell for the kitsch crowd and so forth.
And then there are those that attain cult followings—comparatively small, but passionate, highly dedicated fan bases who prefer series far outside the mainstream. Shows in this category tend to struggle when it comes to maintaining sufficient ratings to remain on the air, as a lot of people will inevitably either stop watching or never bother tuning in in the first place, believing such fare to be too eccentric, too esoteric, too out there, too unapproachable or just too weird. Some examples: Beauty and the Beast, Jericho, Alien Nation, Arrested Development, Firefly, The Prisoner and Spaced.
Twin Peaks also falls into that category. Twin Peaks is that category.
For whatever reason, I never tuned in. Still, I often wondered if I should have, as it sounded like a good fit for me. The series is frequently mentioned in articles about strange or cult TV programs, and I'm a major fan of Kyle MacLachlan, who (Showgirls aside) always elevates whatever projects he's working on, from Dune, Blue Velvet and The Doors to Sex and the City, Desperate Housewives and even The Flintstones (a film I'm not afraid to admit I thought was hilarious).
So when I heard about Twin Peaks: The Definitive Gold Box Edition, containing the entire series, the long-missing pilot episode, a European cut of that pilot, MacLachlan's Saturday Night Live Twin Peaks spoof and the special "Log Lady Intros" filmed for Bravo's 1993 rebroadcast of the series, I decided it was time for me to bite the bullet. The only thing missing was the theatrical follow-up film, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me, which I also picked up.
To quote Keanu Reeves, "Woah."
Right from the haunting and beautiful opening theme music from Angelo Badalamenti, played over serene footage of forestland, natural wildlife and wood-mill machinery, I was hooked. (You can view that intro here, by the way. They sure had long opening credits back then, didn't they? These days, it's just the word "LOST" and the sound of an airplane taking off.)
I began posting little asides about my Twin Peaks experience at my Facebook page, starting with a simple comment, "Rich Handley says... Twin Peaks just might be the weirdest TV show ever made." (My friend Steve, if he's reading this, will no doubt remind me that Facebook is evil. And he's right. But in this case, I'm glad I have an account, or else this particular blog entry wouldn't exist.) Apparently, many of my Facebook "friends" are fans of Twin Peaks as well, because 54 follow-ups were posted to that first comment over a two-day span.
With that in mind, I decided to plagiarize myself and present below some of the observations I made on Facebook. These are not all of my comments, nor do they necessarily flow together smoothly, and they're slightly edited for space constraints (or to fix grammatical errors), but I thought it would be good to capture them here for posterity since not a week goes by that I don't consider deactivating my Facebook account. I'll try to keep them relatively spoiler-free for those who haven't yet watched the series, but a small amount of spoilage is unavoidable, so beware.
• Twin Peaks just gets weirder and weirder. I'm watching season 2 now, and I'm starting to wonder if someone slipped acid—hydrofluoric acid, not LSD—into the White Russian I drank earlier today.
• Season 2 of Twin Peaks is causing me to raise my eyebrows so high that they're starting to fill in my receding hairline.
• I'm still very much enjoying it, despite my frequent desire to smack myself in the face with a two-by-four—largely due to the performance of Kyle MacLachlan, who is absolutely brilliant as Agent Cooper. His tape-recorded messages for his assistant, Diane, are hilarious ("Diane, never drink coffee that has been anywhere near a fish." "Diane, I'm holding in my hands a small box of chocolate bunnies."), and I get such a chuckle out of the sheer glee in his face as he learns the name of a local tree, enjoys country cuisine and so forth.
• Watching this series has been like riding a bicycle through a hilly countryside. The mystery of Laura's murder unfolds, and I grin at the ride ahead. James and Donna come onscreen, however, and the road's pitch increases by 60 degrees, forcing me to pedal [Ed note: I actually wrote "peddle" on Facebook, much to my chagrin, so I'm fixing it here... it's my blog, damnit, and I'll resort to historical revisionism if I want to] harder to stay with it. Switch to Cooper, Truman and Hawk, and the pitch slopes back the other way, allowing me to coast breezily and enjoy the scenery. Then Bobby, Leo and Shelly take the spotlight, and suddenly, the road banks sharply uphill again, and stays that way until Ben, Jerry and Audrey take the stage, and then it's smooth, downhill sailing and a relaxing ride. But all of a sudden, just when I'm feeling the wind at my face and the freshly paved blacktop beneath my tires, BAM, Nadine and her inane super-strength grab the camera, and the road changes so unexpectedly that I find myself sitting in a ditch on the side of the road, watching my bent and punctured bicycle tire spin awkwardly with a cacophonous creak. Luckily, right about then, the Log Lady drives by, accompanied by Leland Palmer, a pair of owls, a dancing dwarf in a red leisure suit, an angelic Dutch giant, a one-armed man, and a maniac killer with a jean jacket and unkempt hair, and I realize that I'll be OK.
• This is a series I've always wanted to watch, as I've heard a lot of great things about it. I had no idea just how WEIRD it was, though. The acting style, the direction, the dialog, the little character moments, the music, the mood... it's all so odd and surreal—jarring and awkward, while at the same time sleepy and serene—as if something out of a dream born out of a long night of burrito consumption, following the conclusion of a three-day bout of feverish insomnia.
• Best thing about Twin Peaks: Leland Palmer—I love this guy! Worst thing about Twin Peaks: Nadine Hurley—I keep hoping she'll be the killer's next victim so I don't have to watch her anymore. Scariest thing about Twin Peaks: Bob—CREEPY! Weirdest thing about Twin Peaks: Agent Cooper's visions of giants and dwarves—WTF? End result of Twin Peaks: Half my brain has dissolved after only 12 episodes.
• The Log Lady... I may not get her in the slightest, especially her nonsensical intros to each episode, but I really like her wise, cryptic, "I'm not really crazy even though I carry around a piece of wood as though it were a baby" approach.
• I'd tune in religiously for a show just featuring Cooper, Truman, Hawk, Ed and Albert tracking down Bob every week, beginning and ending with a tape recording for Diane, with appearances by Leland, Lucy, Ben and Jerry [Ed Note: Ha! I just noticed, while typing that, that these brothers are named after the popular ice-cream vendors.] for comic relief, and the Log Lady to confuse the hell out of me. Those characters are pure gold. Everyone else could be removed from the series and I probably wouldn't even notice.
• Wow... so Laura Palmer's murder gets solved and the case is closed... and then Twin Peaks almost immediately ceases to be interesting. It's like I'm watching a completely different show. Me no likee. Laura's murder is solved in episode 16, which means halfway through the series, I was still really enjoying it. And then... the bottom drops out. Leland's off the show, Lucy's boyfriend Dick is insanely uninteresting, Truman has gone from being a great sidekick to a cardboard cutout... What the HECK happened?
• Who the heck thought it would be a good idea to have Nadine go back to high school? Putting aside the illegality and immorality of a 35-year-old woman being enrolled at a high school... it's a stupid, nonsensical idea. What's more, having Ed go along with it kills HIS character as well. And that's a shame, as I really liked him until now.
• Is the James/Evelyn Marsh storyline going to in ANY way ever connect to what's going on in Twin Peaks? [Ed note: No. It didn't.] I keep wondering why this storyline is even happening, as it seems entirely peripheral (not to mention tedious).
• Don Davis rocks. [Ed note: He basically plays the same character he played on Stargate SG-1 (General Hammond), but with a supernatural angle. As my friend Patrick Drake brilliantly put it, "Don Davis didn't have to steal every scene he was in, the scenes recognized and acknowledged that he was their rightful owner."]
• Ray Wise's Leland Palmer is the best character on the show, and so far, it hasn't recovered from his loss... I love how he jumps without preamble from ballroom dancing to manic crying and back to dancing. Mesmerizing!
• Someone please tell me that a mass murderer will soon come into that town—perhaps one of the owls, even—and slaughter Donna, James, Nadine, Josie and Evelyn Marsh. If I have to endure those pointless characters for the final eight episodes, I may have no choice but to grab the Log Lady's log and bash myself repeatedly in the face. Thanks.
• I became addicted to the show over the past week, and did no work whatsoever on my third book because I had to get my next fix. But now, I feel like someone replaced my fix with baking soda.
• I live for scenes involving interactions between Sheriff Truman and Albert Rosenfeld, the cynical FBI agent. Every time I see the name Miguell Ferrer in the opening credits, I get all giddy, thinking, "Ha! Albert! I wonder if he and Truman will hit each other or hug today." Albert's "I love you, Sheriff Truman" speech is a highlight of the series.
• The good news? That chewing gum I like is going to come back into style.
• I watched the Twin Peaks finale this morning. That just might have contained the single creepiest, scariest TV moment I've ever seen [Ed note: Actually, come to think of it, that title would have to go to the window-tapping scene in Salem's Lot, followed by Tim Curry's "They all float down here, Georgie" speech in It. But the Twin Peaks scene I'm about to describe comes damn close.]. I may have nightmares now. I can't stop replaying it in my head... The scene of Laura in the Black Lodge, running at Cooper, all crazy-eyed and screaming... holy crap. I can't un-see that. When she starts screeching and runs at the camera, I could feel my pulse triple, and when it was all over, I hit pause, blurted out "Holy shit!" and had to catch my breath before continuing.
• "How's Annie?!? How's Annie?!? Hahahaha! How's Annie?!? How's Annie?!?" {{{{shudder}}}}
• Well, I've watched Fire Walk With Me... and I think this film fails on a very basic level: Cohesion. The only way to enjoy it, or even to remotely understand it, is to first see the entire TV series. Anyone viewing it in theaters without first watching the series would have had NO clue whatsoever what was going on at any point in the film, or who characters like Harold or Mike the One-Armed Man or the Log Lady were, due to a near-complete lack of exposition. It's no wonder the film tanked so badly. But even for someone who HAS just watched the entire TV series, the film still comes off as nonsensical and disjointed. What a disappointment.
THE FINAL VERDICT: Unfortunately, the above comments take a negative turn at times. That's because the series does as well—though I'm happy to report that I really dig the finale. After the fiascos that were the Lost and Battlestar Galactica finales, it's nice to see a series ending that I can thoroughly enjoy (even if I don't entirely understand it). Although my love for Twin Peaks waxed and waned over the past week, depending on the particular storyline and character being spotlighted, one thing remained consistently true: I was eminently entertained. Even when the series frustrated the hell out of me, it kept me watching.
It's a damn fine cup of coffee, Diane—I highly recommend tasting it.
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Give the film another try if you haven't already. It rewards repeat viewings.
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